Could I Be a Psychic Vampire?

After reading my posts about what psychic vampirism is and how to identify if you're being psychically drained, while many of you may be wondering how to protect yourself from psychic vampirism, for others, a completely different but equally logical question may be arising: what do I do if I suspect that I may be a psychic vampire?

First off, I applaud you for the level of self-awareness and courage it takes to even consider this question. And secondly, don't beat yourself up. As I've said, psychic vampirism is everywhere, and I believe it's on the rise in direct response to the unprecedented circumstances and demands of modern life. Bottom line, in today's society, almost nobody feels like they have enough, are enough, or can do enough.

And I want to share some personal insight with you, as someone who can dialogue with the unconscious minds of the people who have psychically vampirized me. When I first became aware of this, I was FURIOUS - literally internally screaming at these people, "Who the hell do you think you are, stealing MY light?!" But as I talked through it with their unconscious minds and patterns began to emerge, my approach to the whole thing softened. I realized that not only is psychic vampirism usually totally unconscious, it's even reflexive or automatic. Have you ever heard that when a person is drowning, if someone swims out to save them, then in their blind panic, the drowning person risks drowning their rescuer as well? This is the impression I get from most of the people who have fed on me - they are overwhelmed, they see a bright light, and they just make a blind grab. It's usually not personal, it's more like a survival mechanism. And we are all just trying to survive.

That said, if you suspect that you might be psychically vampirizing someone you care about, or if you think you may have a pattern of vampirizing people in general, there are comprehensive steps you can take to release others' energy, build up your own internal supply, and break the cycle for good.

Immediate Steps to Stop the Drain

Acknowledge and Take Responsibility

The first and most crucial step is honest acknowledgment without drowning in shame. Say to yourself, out loud if possible: "I acknowledge that I may be psychically vampirizing [person's name], and I take responsibility for this behavior. I commit to stopping this pattern and healing whatever is driving it." This acknowledgment alone can begin to shift the energy and reduce the intensity of the drain.

Perform an Immediate Cord Cutting

In my experience, the single most impactful thing you can do to release an attachment to another's energy is a cord cutting, literally severing the nonphysical connection between you. I have witnessed both parties immediately benefitting from this practice, including the vampire, but the person you are feeding on does not need to consciously participate or even know you're doing it for this to be effective. You can follow the detailed cord cutting ritual I use here, or explore the internet for a technique that feels right for you.

Consciously Call Back Your Attachment Energy

Set a clear intention to withdraw any energetic attachments or "hooks" you may have placed in the other person's energy field. Visualize any connections between you dissolving, and see your own energy returning to you - but as it comes back, imagine it being cleansed and purified. You might say something like: "I call back all attachment energy I have placed on [person's name]. I release them completely and reclaim my own power to generate the energy I need."

Send Healing Energy Instead

Once you've withdrawn your vampiric energy, consciously send healing, peaceful energy to the person instead. This doesn't mean you have to have them in your life or even like them - it simply means you're choosing to stop actively draining them. Visualize golden or white light surrounding them, or simply hold the intention that they are free from your energetic demands.

Understanding Why You're Vampirizing Others

Identify Your Energy Deficits 

Take an honest inventory of what areas of your life leave you feeling most depleted. Are you exhausted by work demands? Emotionally starved in relationships? Overwhelmed by responsibilities? Struggling with unprocessed trauma? The better you understand what's creating your energy deficit, the more targeted your healing approach can be.

Recognize Your Vampiric Patterns

Pay attention to when you feel most compelled to drain others. Do you find yourself reaching for certain people's energy when you're stressed? Do you feel energized after being around specific individuals, while they seem tired afterward? Do you unconsciously seek out interactions with people who make you feel "charged up"? Recognizing these patterns is crucial for interrupting them.

Examine Your Unconscious Motivations

Based on my dialogues with vampires' unconscious minds, most fall into several categories: those who feel they "need" others' light to function, those who feel they "deserve" it based on their importance or suffering, those who feel others "owe" them energy, those who are simply addicted to the high of others' light, and those who drain out of spite or revenge. Which category resonates with you? Understanding your unconscious motivation helps direct your healing work.

Look at Your Relationship with Your Own Light

Often, people who vampirize others have lost connection to their own inner light source. Maybe you were taught you weren't good enough and your light dimmed. Maybe trauma depleted your natural energy reserves. Maybe chronic stress has left you feeling perpetually empty. Maybe you're surrounded by people who drain you, leaving you desperate for energy anywhere you can find it. Understanding what happened to your own light is key to reclaiming it.

Rebuilding Your Own Energy Supply

Reconnect with Your Heart Light

Another great way to shift to relying on yourself is to consciously cultivate your own light. This involves a simple but powerful exercise. Get comfortable, close your eyes, and drop into your heartspace. There, set the intention to meet your own light. You may only see a pinpoint at first. What color is this light? Everyone's light will be a unique color (white is also a possibility), and while other people's colors may currently seem very attractive to you, it is ultimately your own color that you want, because that will help you feel the best.

So, see this pinpoint of your unique light - then breathe into it until this light fills your heart completely. Feel how it feels to have your heart filled with your own unique light. Then imagine it expanding outward from your heart to fill your whole body - this unique light filling up your head, your chest, your torso, your back, and your limbs. Let it expand all the way out to your fingertips and toes! How does that feel? You should feel lighter, more energized, more fulfilled. This energy - your very own heart light - is always there for you, ready for you to call on it whenever you need a boost. Make a practice of expanding your heart light daily. The more often you do it, the stronger it gets, and the more automatic it will become.

Focus on Raising Your Vibration

The better you feel, the less you will feel the need to feed on other people's energy. So, what can you do to naturally help boost your own energy? One of the simplest ways is to focus on raising your vibration. This can be done in countless ways that the internet is happy to help you explore further, but as a baseline, you can listen to more uplifting music, get regular exercise, eat a healthier diet, spend time in nature, or take up a meditation practice. You could even consider getting regular Reiki sessions to help rebalance your energy system. All of these can boost your energy and help you feel replenished.

Address Physical and Emotional Depletion

Sometimes vampirism stems from very practical issues. Are you getting enough sleep? Eating nourishing foods? Moving your body regularly? Are you chronically stressed or dealing with unprocessed emotions? Taking care of your basic physical and emotional needs can dramatically reduce the compulsion to drain others.

Cultivate Self-Love and Acceptance

It could help your energy if you work on boosting your self-esteem and practicing self-love and acceptance, with the help of a therapist, or using any of the many resources and practices available online. When you truly love and accept yourself, you naturally generate more of your own light. It would also help to dial back on the things and people that make you feel down on yourself, from toxic relationships to social media.

Healing the Root Causes

Address Underlying Trauma 

Healing past trauma is very important in restoring our own natural energy, and there are many proven modalities out there, such as somatic work or EMDR. Vampirism often stems from early wounding - perhaps you didn't receive enough attention, love, or validation as a child, leaving you with an unconscious hunger for others' energy. Maybe you experienced trauma that created energetic "holes" or depletion in your system. Working with a trauma-informed therapist can help you heal these foundational wounds.

Explore Your Shadow Aspects

The parts of yourself that engage in vampirism are often shadow aspects - the parts you've rejected or been taught to hide. Maybe you learned that needing others was weakness, so now you take their energy unconsciously rather than asking directly. Maybe you were taught that anger was bad, so you drain others instead of expressing your legitimate frustrations. Shadow work can help you integrate these rejected parts in healthier ways. It helps us understand, have compassion for, and heal the repressed darker parts of ourselves.

Process Grief and Loss

Often underlying vampirism is deep grief - grief over what you never received, what was taken from you, or what you've lost. This grief creates an energetic vacuum that seeks to be filled through others' light. Allowing yourself to fully feel and process this grief can reduce the compulsive need to drain others.

Work with Childhood Programming

Many vampires were raised in environments where love was conditional, scarce, or inconsistent. This can create unconscious programs like "I have to take what I need because no one will freely give it to me" or "Others have what I need, and I don't deserve it, so I have to steal it." Identifying and reprogramming these unconscious beliefs is crucial for lasting change.

Managing Life Circumstances that Drive Vampirism

Address Chronic Stress and Overwhelm

Of course, it's possible that you might be engaging in psychic vampirism simply because of chronic stress in meeting the demands of your daily life, making you feel perpetually depleted. In this case, you have a couple of options: you can look into stress management techniques, such as grounding techniques and meditation practices, or you could consider making larger changes in your life to reduce your stress level. Is a change of jobs in order? Or could it be as simple as having your partner watch the kids a couple nights a week so you can have some dedicated me-time? Or would it give you some much-needed energy to carve out a few hours each week to focus on a hobby or passion, introducing some playtime into your life?

Communicate Your Unmet Needs

Then there's the psychic vampirism that comes from unmet needs. Could you be feeding on a friend, family member, or partner because you're craving more of their love, time, or validation? If so, the key is communication. Try to get a sense of exactly what needs aren't being met and how or why, like through journaling or with a therapist, and then have an honest conversation with the other person about how you feel. You might be surprised how open people are to working with you when you are honest and vulnerable about your feelings and needs.

Learn to Meet Your Own Needs

Furthermore, there is always the possibility to learn to better meet your own needs, through therapy or focusing on practices of self-love and acceptance. This might involve learning to validate yourself instead of seeking constant external validation, or developing internal sources of comfort instead of relying on others to soothe you.

Create Healthy Outlets for Intense Emotions

If you're vampirizing others because you're overwhelmed by emotions like frustration, loneliness, or desperation, create healthy outlets for these feelings. This might involve journaling, creative expression, physical exercise, or working with a therapist to develop better emotional regulation skills.

Protecting Yourself from Being Vampirized

Finally, you may be vampirizing others simply because others people are vampirizing you, and you feel drained all the time. This creates what I call the "vampiric cycle" - you're drained by others, so you unconsciously drain someone else, who then may drain yet another person, and so on. Breaking this cycle requires both protecting yourself from incoming drains and stopping your own vampiric behavior. In this case, it is imperative that you practice psychic protection and try some protective cord cuttings, which we explore in the psychic protection section. Once your own energy is protected, you may no longer feel a need to drain others.

Preventing Future Vampirism

Develop Regular Energy Practices

Make energy cultivation a daily practice rather than waiting until you're depleted. This might involve meditation, breathwork, time in nature, creative expression, or any practice that helps you generate and maintain your own energy supply.

Monitor Your Energy Levels

Learn to recognize the early warning signs that you're becoming energetically depleted, before you reach the point where you unconsciously start draining others. This might include feeling anxious, irritable, spacey, or suddenly finding yourself drawn to certain people's energy.

Create Energy Boundaries

Learn to set energetic boundaries that prevent both incoming drains and outgoing vampirism. This might involve visualization techniques, protective rituals, or simply practicing conscious awareness of your energetic interactions with others.

Build a Support Network

Often vampirism happens when we feel isolated and alone with our struggles. Build a network of relationships where energy exchange is mutual and conscious rather than one-sided and unconscious. This might include friends, family, therapy groups, or spiritual communities.

Making Amends and Moving Forward

Energetic Apologies

Even if you can't or shouldn't contact the person directly, you can offer energetic apologies. Sit quietly and direct thoughts of genuine remorse toward the person, asking for forgiveness and promising to stop the harmful behavior. This can provide relief for both parties.

Commit to Conscious Energy Exchange

Moving forward, commit to making your energy exchanges with others conscious and mutual rather than unconscious and one-sided. This means being aware of when you're receiving energy from others and ensuring you're also giving back in healthy ways.

Monitor Your Progress

Pay attention to how you feel as you stop vampirizing others. You should notice increased energy, better mood, improved relationships, and a greater sense of personal power and integrity. This positive feedback will help reinforce your new patterns.

Redirect Your Energy Toward Service

Instead of taking energy from others, consider how you can use your own energy in service of healing and helping others. This creates a positive cycle where giving energy actually generates more energy, rather than the depleting cycle of vampirism.

Working with Professional Help

If you're struggling to stop vampirizing others, if the pattern feels compulsive or out of control, or if you're dealing with severe trauma or mental health issues, it's important to seek professional help. Look for therapists or energy workers who understand both psychological and energetic aspects of healing. Personally, I have found the emerging AI therapy apps (I love Ash, https://www.talktoash.com/) to be beyond helpful in so many regards - a great option if you're nervous about seeing a therapist or just can't afford it.

Some people find that working with experienced shamans, energy healers, or spiritual counselors can be particularly effective for addressing the energetic components of vampirism while also working with traditional therapy to address the psychological aspects.

The Path Forward

Recognizing that you may be vampirizing others is actually a profound step toward spiritual and emotional maturity. Most people who engage in psychic vampirism never become conscious of it, remaining trapped in unconscious patterns that drain both themselves and others.

Your willingness to examine this shadow aspect of yourself shows that you're ready to break free from unconscious patterns and step into conscious relationship with your own power and energy. The energy that you've been unconsciously taking from others can be redirected into healing, creativity, and authentic connection.

Remember that transforming vampiric patterns isn't about becoming perfect or never feeling needy again. It's about developing conscious relationship with your energy and needs, and learning to meet them in ways that honor both yourself and others.

As you heal the wounds that drive vampirism and reconnect with your own inner light source, you'll likely find that you have more energy and vitality than ever before. This is because vampirism, while temporarily energizing, is ultimately depleting - it keeps you dependent on external sources rather than developing your own infinite inner resources.

The path from vampirism to energetic sovereignty is one of the most liberating journeys you can undertake. By doing this work, you're not only freeing yourself from unconscious patterns, you're also contributing to the healing of our collective energy field. Every person who chooses conscious energy cultivation over unconscious vampirism makes the world a little bit brighter.

Thank you so much for reading, and I would love to hear about your personal experiences or any questions you may have in the comments. May you be blessed with all the energy and light you need to shine your brightest!